29 5 / 2012
"‘I withdraw into myself, and discover a world, albeit a national world of dark desire rather than one of actuality and vital strength. And everything swims before my senses, and I go my way in the world wearing the smile of the dreamer.’"
28 5 / 2012
update : the life of a twenty-one year old
disclaimer: personal thoughts, I only have one tumblr so please deal with it…its not my fault you’re not used to people being open.
I guess we can start by the roles of responsibility. Although I’d like to inhabit all responsibility, I think there is enough on my plate, maybe a little too much. Do you ever feel like there just isn’t enough time in the world to be doing all of this? I guess right now my mind has been skipping back and forth, trying to catch up with the world and what it expects from me.
Maybe my thoughts are wrong and I could figure out a way to handle everything and keep calm about it. Yet, I find myself rushing through it and know that I’m missing the true essence that these experiences were meant for. Anyways, soon enough I believe I’ll need a good mental health day…soon enough.
17 5 / 2012
‘impulsive actions won’t create the lasting results you seek’
…why wasn’t I told this two months ago?
15 5 / 2012
have you ever felt like you’re just this time bomb ticking?
I’ve never realized this but for an angry person whose kept calm and carried on for so long…the truth is, there is an expiry date to this calmness. I’m sorry but I don’t think that one should conform to the world 24/7 just to stay peaceful when all anger is bottled deep inside.
Anyways, this is my only form of release, so please if this is too personal ABORT MISSION TO READ NOW!
Now it is evident that the world does not revolve around me, and I don’t expect it to. However as an individual, it is very important to self-evaluate once in a while. Just recently my heart had been lightly skinned, no not shattered…but just enough to shed a layer off. After this 808heartbreak as mister Kanye West would describe it, I began to question myself (wouldn’t anyone?). Five years of rebuilding myself from a tragic event and trying to shape into a person that society finds acceptable, and now all that is questionable. And I know the cause of this break was not relative to anything I have done wrong (at least thats the case I am lead to believe..), however the break would obviously have an affect on one’s self-esteem…(I believe this is completely normal). Maybe I’m just bitching, but I think it’s about time to say what I think. I don’t know if improving ones self is worth the time anymore, especially if you’ve done all you could to understand others and try to participate in the power of goodness. So what now?…I guess its time to do what I want to and need to do, and tell everyone to fuck off if they get in the way. Judge me all you want, but this world is vicious, you might as well play the game.
Disclaimer: Not directed to anyone, and if you think so, get that thought out of your head, you just a paranoid ‘muh-fukuh’.
13 5 / 2012
"The amount of happiness that you have depends on the amount of freedom you have in your heart."
13 5 / 2012
"Private judgement runs riot. Every architect has a theory of his own"
